Does Your Writing Scream LOSER?

“I can tell she hates me, just looking at her.”

My fiance and I are at a party, huddling up in somebody else’s kitchen. Things have been awkward/a disaster and I’m taking a few minutes to explain why.

She’s not really biting. Not yet, anyway. “I think you’re just being an asshole. She’s been really nice.”

And she has been. All of the words have been perfectly nice. How’ve you been doing. How are things in Atlanta. Oh, I like that TV show too. All the basics of obligatory conversation. But…

“Conversation isn’t about words. She rolls her eyes. She uses short sentences all the time. She does those creepy smiles where you just use your lips.”

She crosses her arms. “You’re like Sherlock Holmes, but your powers are completely useless.”

But it’s true. What you say isn’t just about your choice of words. There are a thousand different things that give away your real feelings about a person or a situation.  That applies to your small-talk at parties, the time you spend going out on dates… or (and this is the relevant part) when you’re making a sale online.

Weakness In Copywriting

"What you say isn't just about your choice of words."

“What you say isn’t just about your choice of words.”

Your writing can dig into the prospect of your target, or it can be a mirror into your own psyche. If you’re using too many words in your sales copy, you’re doing the equivalent of rambling during an in-person presentation. When somebody rambles, it’s a sign that they’re insecure about the power of their point and have to go to insane lengths to justify it.

If you’re dating a girl, and you talk about your job forever, and your friends forever, and your appearance forever, you’re usually communicating insecurity. But if you’re talking just a little and infusing your every word with quiet passion and determination, you’re inflating your value.

You can fix this by going through your copy and trimming it for time. Look for qualifiers (one of, sort of, among the) and snip them out. Don’t be desperate to appease anybody – especially if the product is yourself.

Don’t Be Full Of Yourself

Narcissism? That’s just crippling insecurity for extroverts. If your copy goes on and on talking about your product or your service, or talks in circles, it’s a sign that you’re thinking too much about you and not enough about the reader. Even if you’re talking about the benefits the prospect will get if they use your product you’re still being self-absorbed and not thinking about the prospect’s time.

You can fix this with economy, too. Look at the structure of your copy on a macro level. Are you making points that are redundant or in circles or barely relevant? Snip them out.

Communicating Authority In Copy

We can communicate power with our words just as strongly as we do in person. That power starts before you pick up a pen. When you’ve done your homework and present information in a compelling way, it goes a long way towards demonstrating that you know what you’re talking about.

Don’t use run-on sentences. Make short statements that get to the point as effectively as possible.

Don’t be monotonous. Vary your speed and tone.

And use vocabulary that’s unique and stirring. When your words are boring and you lean on cliches, you’re not standing out as somebody worth latching onto and following. When you use action words and colorful analogies, you show people that you’re not a weenie.


  1. I have been turned off by so many articles, books and blog posts that are full of narcissism that I can’t even count them all. Writers need to take a step back every once in a while and read what they are writing; I tend to do it away from my desk so I can have a more relaxed standpoint on the content.

Leave a Comment

CommentLuv badge